Coffee of the Day - Mocha Mint
Oh the twists and turns the roads we walk do take.... thunderstorms are approaching, my dear friends. but you need a rain shower in order to make those beautiful rainbows, don't you? Rainbows are filled with such promise, such beauty, let us never forget for one moment.
My hair is almost completely gone. Not really such a biggie in the long run, but it is sure annoying to have it constantly falling out into my face. I seem to leave piles of it every where I go - worse than the dogs. so glad we cut it down to just an inch or so or else it would be very traumatic to see clumps of it all over the place. We'll be shaving it off today if possible. I have these horrid sores that have cropped up all over my body, but especially on my poor little head. My teeth are turning a strange shade of grey, and oh, how my bones just hurt.
I tried to let Tyler and Mick know over the phone that their Mom is looking much different, but when Mick came home this weekend for a quick trip, the look on his face said it all. poor guy tried to hide it, but I could see the horror in his eyes. How I would love to not ever have my family go through this battle - to be able to protect them the way a Mother should from the trials of life so they don't have to watch...... that is the hardest part of this walk. I don't care what happens to me - better me than anyone else. but oh good golly..... don't make it hard on my guys. that breaks my heart into pieces.
I ask for prayers for them, please. I will be fine, no matter where this road takes me. But my family.... oh my. They didn't sign on for this. and the tears I cry are all for them. I see the look in their eyes and it rips me apart. I would protect them from this if I could. I would keep them from having to see my body fall apart and decay. I truly am turning into a zombie right in front of them. and there is nothing I can do to shelter them from the horror of what I am becoming.
But there is still joy.... I know it deep down inside. I feel it and I can see it. A robin has built her nest right outside our back porch room. I watched her on Saturday bring the pieces to the lilac bush where she has decided her family home should be. On Sunday I saw the most beautiful red fox running along side the road. It's been years since I last saw one in its natural habitat. My cat friend comes by every day to visit with me on the back steps. He will even let me pet him now. So while my body changes there are still precious moments of beauty if we can but stop and find a moment to be still and enjoy them.